Since we've started the "Baby #2" discussion, I've been having such a hard time coping with the idea of having to share my limited time between two little people. As it is now, it is already hard not to be selfish with my limited free time (something I am working on) and I feel so guilty when I do something for myself by myself on the weekends when I could be spending that time with Ami.
I know I definitely want the kid to have siblings. A lot of them. But I am having doubts as to what kind of mother I can be when I spend 40+ hours a week away from home behind a desk. I've already outsourced most of Ami's 3 years on this planet to my mother who, although she does a great job, cannot raise him in the way I want or have envisioned. How will it be with 2 kids?
I guess I just have to go with the flow. I know one thing for sure, I've never loved anyone like I love the kid, and even though I scream and threaten to take away all of his possessions he loves me like no one else ever has. Maybe that love times 2 will make the headaches and stress worth it.
